Note (not just to self): If you haven't worn your interview suit in two years, you should probably try it on before you make any plans to wear it. Cause, ehem, it may not fit you so well any more.

Feeling better today.

I can't seem to decide what color I like best for this page. It's been green, white, grey, light yellow... I'm so wishy washy lately. In a number of respects.

Last night I dreamed I gave birth. My figure immediately went back down to size and either no one believed me or no one cared that I had just had a baby.

The baby turned out to be a very un-cute blonde cabbage patch doll. I resented the fact that it didn't look anything like Zach or myself. I kept forgetting it places. I am an unfit mother.

Check it out. Here is our beautiful home on streetview!




Rat garden / urban prairie - stage left.

I don't know how I feel about the fact that today you're a leprechaun in streetview.

Deep down I don't know how I feel about St. Patrick's day.
Actually, when exactly did I pick up this sense of elitism? It seems like by third grade it's common knowledge that it's not cool to wear green on St. Patrick's day. But when did I reach the point where I consider not leaving my apartment for the weekend? Seriously, snob. What harm are a bunch of stumbling drunk girls in shamrock pajamas?

I'm tired of blogging. I'm going to go sew.

Today sucked. I was crabby. Cloud over me head. THE END.

Note to self: Don't be so sensitive. When things are going well for you there will always be more people who want to crap on your parade than cheer you along.

Man. I sure can eat a lot.

Love Songs

Five+ shows went on sale and five+ shows sold out. Fortunately I got my tickets before the latter happened. I feel like we're going to see Hannah Montana but no, much better. Today is Magnetic Fields day! Finally! What a great way to celebrate my "new" job! The venue is right by Tank sushi so we can go get tempura goat cheese with walnuts salad before the show.

Stephin Merritt is a song writing machine. I'm expecting/hoping to be completely inspired by the time I get home.

Here's a funny video of his stint with NPR - taking them up on the challenge of writing a song in two days. He's such a funny little grumpybear of a man in his monochromatic brown outfit. So un-amuseable yet utterly amusing:

Link

Hoping we can avoid all St. Pats day drunks. For that reason this is usually my least favorite weekend of every year.....

It's a 25% raise! YES!!!
They're giving me a blackberry! NO!!!

YES!

I have an official job offer! Official! Official! Soon I can go to a dentist again! And and and....

They have to cut my hair to do a drug screen before it's all final. Cut. my. hair. So extreme.

NEWWW KOMPUUUTOR!!!!!

Check

me

out blogosphere.

I am writing to you from my BRAND NEW KOMPUTOR!!

So clean! So slick! So actually functional!
You've got to understand that after years of dealing with that sputtering ibook this is a mind blowing experience. I may as well have been typing on a clamshell all this time. Widgets and a magnetic power cable! What am I to do with myself?! And Photobooth!!!



I just don't know where to start.

buggy. booo...

I seem to have a little bug today. Not coming up with the right things to keep me from feeling restless on couch-rest. I'm very tired of television, and (no offense) the internet is boring me. I've looked at hundreds of photos of baby animals, ordered couch fabric swatches, read about alexander the great on Wikipedia.... And I'm restless. I haven't been sicky in a while and I'm out of practice. I will make a terrible retired person.

On a happier note, here is one of my top picks of the baby animal phtos:



There's a new reality show on Animal Planet about a baby elephant orphanage. Have you seen that crap? Omg. Quality telivision.

Take back the morning

I'm sad. I overslept today and I feel like a total loser. And I'm guessing I expect that I'll feel better if I write about it here.

Master Bedroom

Maybe it was five years ago when my brother and his wife got me this print for Christmas. I forget who the artist is, but I remember that the name of it is "Master Bedroom." At the time I was fostering greyhounds. I didn't have this apartment. I didn't have Fannie. I didn't have Zach. Actually, I think that at that point my bed was a mattress on a floor. And I find it just correct that this is what I see every morning now.

Garfield Minus Garfield

Dear Blog, It's true that as I've grown older Garfield has kind of grown on me and my aging sense of humor. But today my co-worker sent me the best Garfield thing ever:

Who would have guessed that when you remove Garfield from the Garfield comic strips, the result is an even better comic about schizophrenia, bipolor disorder, and the empty desperation of modern life?

--->MORE MORE MORE NO GARFIELD!!!<---

I planned on writing all about our new ipods last night

after saving up credit card rewards points and checking the mail for tax returns for months...... But we got them home and realized we need a new operating system (and maybe even a new computer for me. ugh.) in order to use them.

Total. Bummer.

Come on Apple. You're really letting your head get big. First the iPhone pricing and now this. Don't think I won't ever go PC on you.

I so looked forward to being able to watch cartoons on the train today.

The Union and Eye

I saw this eyewash station sign in a plant I was working at the other day and I thought it would make a good tattoo for someone. Or something. Or a good kite design. Or Halloween costume inspiration. Maybe I'll go as a Resident this year!

Keep yer head down and yer mind occupied.

I just worked a twelve hour day. And I probs could've kept going. Whoa. Andreas in motion stay in motion.

Zach just told me that Rob Lowe has a new band with someone from US Maple. It took me a good five minutes to figure out that it wasn't that Rob Lowe, but rather the one we know. That's right. For a brief moment of time I had flashbacks of Dogstar and almost lost all respect for the dudes of US Maple. Ah phew. Look up "Singer" if curiosity's got you.

Winter's just got to end so I can get out more often.
It's been so long since I've um... appreciated an out of tune guitar.

Sleepy. And full. Zach made huge and amazing burritos tonight. I have a bad habit of eating too much in one sitting lately. Filling myself beyond capacity. I visited Josh in Texas a week ago and pretty much completely ruined my own fun by doing this. The entire time I was there I was either painfully over tired or painfully over full.

Things are quiet. All I hear is the clicking of keys. Two clocks on the wall. The furnace. Dog sigh. Little dog hiccough.

I've become kind of bad at documenting my life. I'd rather spend my free time napping. Come on Spring. Come on Spring.

Monday. Man I'm crabby this morning. Must shake it. Shake it. The day will be much easier if you shake it.

It's 8am and men are standing outside of my cube talking about golf. It's February. In Illinois.

Yawn.

The pup is looking real cute on my embroidered pillow right now:



Oh wait you know I never ever posted pictures of these pillows I made! Embroidery is really fun and easy. And good for people who ride trains or are too anxious to sit still much in general. You should try it. I can show you how. I know maybe four different stitches now. Here are my pillows. There are two of them:





You're free little bird!



Andrea was here. xoxo

Today is Saturday. I haven't left the house yet and I don't intend to. January is good for that. I have a pile of things to read, pad thai from Penny's is on its way to our door and um... Miss America Reality Check is on? Is this how people get fat and socially inept? Alright, just wondering.

I want a vacation. Preferably one with a beach and few Americans. More specifically no Spring Breakers. And maybe a hut on stilts. And some pretty birds that I've never seen before. And guided pony rides. In the Western hemisphere. Any suggestions?

hello blue monday

Today is actually Blue Monday. Go figure!
Greetings from my new cubicle.
Sigh.

So I'm moving to my new cubicle on Monday. I really need this to put on my desk there. Who's gonna help me out here? Anyone?

Oh look, it's past my bedtime again.

It's overwhelming sometimes.

When you're asked to put something together for a decision making process that really gives you hope. You work very hard and put in extra hours and think about ways to improve it in the shower and in your sleep. And then you come to learn that your work was never used. And it hurts your feelings, and it makes you take a step back and wonder why you care. But it really does matter to you.

And then you learn that your friend's stepfather just shot himself on his first day of hospice care with his mother in the next room. And you feel even more ashamed for worrying about things that don't matter in a grand scheme.

Your home life is wonderful and you know this. You have the means to stop on your way home to buy little presents for your dog and your Zach. And even if you didn't, they would still know how much you love them.

And you brood and live out your existential crisis the entire drive, white knuckled and squinting at the snow, until your tiny niece calls to tell you that she's looking at a picture in a frame of you and your brother in halloween costumes when you were small. And you tell her you're glad to hear from her although it makes you feel like crying.

And as you walk up the steps of your apartment you think of breaking into the bottle of wine in the kitchen, even though you know you'll be drinking alone. But you realize that each decision like this puts you one step closer to your alcoholic grandparents... and you think twice about even bringing it up because you know that your mother will read and you worry that you'll break her heart.

But you can't shake the feeling you got when you read the last email of the day, telling you that you're being relocated to a smaller cubicle. The standard joke doesn't soften the blow this time. And you feel utterly ashamed for caring.

Today was a crappy day. I don't even feel like elaborating. I'm totally de-motivated.

a tesseract and a portable hole for 500

Crash & burn! Crash & burn! I don't know if I can take much more excitement! And the fact that there's no windows in my new office makes it all feel like it's happening in a vacuum. Time warp.

Do time warps or vacuums amplify things? Or do they just suck your brains out and squish you into one dimension? I'm forgetting my physics.

I take that back, because I crawled back under my blankets and didn't wake up until 5:30pm today. Phew.

Gosh. Sleeping sure is hard lately.

I'm tired. Tired. So tired.

Way past my bedtime

Up late. Again. Thinking thinking. Thinking about everything and nothing. Excited about all the possibilities the next few years can bring. Or the next few weeks even. And entirely aware that everything could just as easily go all wrong.

Jobs are a funny thing. Define so much of our lives as much as we want to deny it. The people I work with - they're my sphere. We feel the same frustrations. And it's not even for the fact that the common enemy is the strongest unifier - they're my buddies, no doubt.

And so... decisions. Sometimes they keep me up at night.

Of course, sometimes thinking about things like the White Hen/7 Eleven merger keep me up way late at night too. I guess I pretty much always have this problem.

I know what's important to me. It's not money. It's people. I only wish I knew how fleeting the people qualities I seek may or may not be.

Also, you know, having a little family - meaning my Zach and my poodle... It really does make you more vulnerable in a sense. Loving things that much. I have more to lay awake and worry about. Because there's so much more that can be taken from me now than before they came along. This thing I'm describing has been covered many times in the past by writers and sailors and military dudes I'm sure, but I can't remember a single reference.

That part is totally unrelated to the jobs rant. But it spirals up there along with the mock interview questions and visions of dancing taquitos and worries about whether or not I'm capable of totally revamping my evening bedtime rituals.

Man I'm gonna be a mess tomorrow.

Good startz,eh?

Wee hoo! I just re-wired my vintage lamps. They're all like new with their one-prong-fatter-than-the-other and that (I know there is a name for that newer plug. Someone speak up. What is it, grounded?). Though I left the sweet rusty patinas. Now we are all a little safer from electrical fires, and I feel pretty awesome and accomplished.

While I was busy with that and other things, Zach was re-doing our office/fort to be a highly functional cockpit of technology. We've got the dual monitors, the scanner, the printer, the tablet, the shredder, electric pencil sharpener, auxiliary speakers, mbox, midi controller and all the guitars within arms reach. And dang if it ain't cozy! Then he vacuumed the rug. Hot damn.

Earlier in the day we found a few bags of clothes to take to Salvation Army.
Right now Zach is washing out the filter to the vacuum cleaner.
Next in order for me is to alphabetize a few hundred cds and get the proper ones transferred to the komputorz.

New Years Day is always either the most productive or the least.

ps - something in our apt smells like gas. we've checked the furnace, stove, oven and water heaters but aren't finding anything. so, if we die... I leave my schwinn to Melissa because she is short. It's in the garage. Or maybe Meredith. Well, you can argue over it or flip a coin. Whatever's cool with me.

Oh happy new year and hooray! We're home from the bar and for once we don't smell like butt! Thank you 2008 - already - for your smoking ban. May all of my friends catch up with me and gain their 15 lbs this year.

So awesome. We don't even have to wash everything we wore tonight. Welcome to the future!

Happy Xmas everyone!

Sorry I've been tight lipped as of late, but as most of my energies and time have gone into work, all I'd be blabbing about is work. And I think we all know it isn't kosher to blab too much about work on the internets. Let's just say it's got a fire under my butt and I've been accomplishing things I never thought possible.

So... For the past 24 & upcoming 24 hours I'm spending as much time as possible sitting on my couch with zach and the dog. Catching up on the internet. Catching up on Talk Soup. Catching up on moments of absolutely zero thought. It's pretty awesome.

We took our big ol area rug in to get cleaned today. Not that it looks dirty - I just know from how many foster dogs have played on it that it's got to be dirty. And as much as I think that dry cleaning is a scam, I think about what carpet looks like under a microscope and I'm willing to pay almost anyone to convince me it's cleaner than before I brought it to them.

The room looks sort of cold without it.

Also, I fell down the stairs today and smacked my head and hurt some arms and things. That whole want to cry and laugh at the same time feeling is so perplexing. I hope that in 2008 I'm less clumsy.

Talk about jinxing things. Ugh.

Jump start. I really have a need to be smart today. But I'm feeling more confused than anything. The gears are moving slowly... Caffeinating....

Not to jinx myself (for the part of me who believes in the power of jinxing matters), but I work with the nicest, most supportive people I've ever worked with in my life. When one person gets thrown under the bus, I swear it's like a family matter over here. Such a feeling of well-being.

It's really ridiculous how often I use MS Paint at my job.

It's 9:45am and I've already eaten my lunch. I hate when that happens. Ugh.

It's so hard not to be lazy on the weekends. No matter what I get done, I still manage to sleep an embarrassing amount. Some day I won't be able to do this. Some day I'll have obligations outside of work.

My phone was off the entire day yesterday and I didn't even notice.

So tired that I feel crazy. Crazy I tell you. I have tunnel vision and vertigo. And so much to do! Thank goodness I can take the train home tonight instead of driving. And I have a new long and puffy coat with a fuzzy hood, so I can wrap up lean my head against the window and sleep all the way home. Like I'm a great big blue caterpillar. Four more hours or so. Bzzzt.

Oh yay! Saturn is soon to be making a little pod car too! Yes yes come on everyone. Get into it. More little cars! More little cars!

-->annoying, flash-based Astra pre-sale page<--

I have to say the four door like the one below is pretty cute:



kind of ... golfy, no? er, rabbity? But the hatch entrance, once opened, appears to be really tiny and impractical. Just like the new volvo C30 hatch. Like you're ever gonna be able to get your surfboard, llama, xmas tree and sweet guitar amps in and out of that spot without killing one of the three of you (you, your car, or object to be transported). How can you get something like that wrong? It's the main utilitiy of a hatch back, people.

See, I should be in charge of things like this. Most especilly hatchbacks. Duh.

Gosh. I've become a really bad blogger. I'll try and maybe write something on the train on the way home if'n I'm feeling too dumb to do my work-work. Not that you're second best. Not at all. It's just that you don't pay me to blog. Work, however... Oh what does that make me?

okay okay. so the entire show embarrasses me.

um. the guitar hero scene on gossip girl? I feel embarrassed.

Advantage of having a bald-assed poodle

Tattoos!

I like that these things show up when you google image search "cool hand luke"



A hard boiled egg I can understand, but.. whatever.

I originally made this blog so that my family could join in the fun, but for obvious reasons my brother's been too busy. Dad's got his round of car sites he visits. And I suppose my mom just isn't into blogs.

That being said, I can dish on xmas presents: Today Zach and I got the nephew a tiny old-timey veleur adidas track suit in red and blue. The little striped legs are about 7 inches long and I keep pulling it out of the bag to look at it. It's funny. I mean, even too small to put on the dog. A fine example of rule of cuteness number what, seven? Fourteen? I bet that baby breaks a number of the rules.

One of the reasons I look forward to having babies: Dressing them like adults.
Another reason: Making them do the dishes. For real, there are few things I hate more than doing dishes.

Okay now that we're further into Cool Hand Luke I get the hound thing. Blue done run himself to death. Can't wait to see if the llamas come into play.

Squeeee!

Just amazing. Cuties absoluties.

Weeeeeee!

Oh dang! Zach and I are uncles! Let the cuteness begin.
More photos over here.

His name is Dominic. And he has some hair. That's all I know.

: )

Baby's coming! Baby's coming! Baby's coming!

Right now!!