Today is Saturday. I haven't left the house yet and I don't intend to. January is good for that. I have a pile of things to read, pad thai from Penny's is on its way to our door and um... Miss America Reality Check is on? Is this how people get fat and socially inept? Alright, just wondering.

I want a vacation. Preferably one with a beach and few Americans. More specifically no Spring Breakers. And maybe a hut on stilts. And some pretty birds that I've never seen before. And guided pony rides. In the Western hemisphere. Any suggestions?